Stages of Grief - The Role of Anger in the Grieving Process

Is Anger a stage of Grief?

ARTICLE SUMMARY

“I said 4 ice cubes, not five for my drink” shouted Dave at his daughter, who came over to help out. She cringed at the words, feeling both guilt and anger at what she had done and what he had said. Her father was angry at the world, and she was the closest one to him now, and she felt the brunt of it.

Is Anger a stage?

Anger is part of the grief process, and it can be very difficult to cope from the family and heath care provider’s standpoint.
It can be directed at anyone and everyone at any time.
Rational or irrational, your loved one is striking out in response to the blow they have received, the news of their dying.
Pray for patience during this time.

Visitors, even you, may not be welcome by your loved one. Put yourself into their shoes. Would you be angry if your life was interrupted in this way?

To help your loved one though this tough stage of grief, you should encourage him to express their rage, and to cry. They need to be able to express their fears – fear of pain, fear of dying alone, to someone who can quietly listen, and not react. You may need to accept some irrational anger at times, knowing their release of anger may help them to move past this stage of grief.

Is Anger a stage of Grief?

FULL ARTICLE

“I said 4 ice cubes, not five for my drink” shouted Dave at his daughter, who came over to help out. She cringed at the words, feeling both guilt and anger at what she had done and what he had said. Her father was angry at the world, and she was the closest one to him now, and she felt the brunt of it.

Anger is part of the grief process, and it can be very difficult to cope from the family and heath care provider’s standpoint. It can be directed at anyone and everyone at any time. The food is to hot, to cold. The bed is to hard, to soft. The chair is to big, too small, but never just right. Rational or irrational, your loved one is striking out in response to the blow they have received. Pray for patience during this time.

Visitors, even you, may not be welcome by your loved one. This of course makes visits more painful, and may result in avoidance. You should not avoid visits because of your own grief or guilt, as this may increase your loved one’s own grief, Instead put yourself into their shoes. Would you be angry if your life was interrupted in this way? Most of us would act that way, and perhaps act even worse.

To help your loved one though this tough stage of grief, you should encourage him to express their rage, and to cry. They need to be able to express their fears to someone who can quietly listen, and not react. You may need to accept some irrational anger at times, knowing their release of anger may help them to move past this stage of grief.